:: nothing in particular ::

:: Sunday, November 12, 2006 ::

Dear Friends and Readers,

It has been quite a while since you have seen me post anything here. It isn't that I don't want to, it is that I must not. These past few months have changed many things in my life, changes I didn't see coming. I have faced the destruction of friendships, the loss of those I care about, and the disgrace of being an "uneducated" man. I am also slowly finding myself put into more positions where I must protect and defend against things most people cannot understand. However, my professional skills and and abilities have been improving significantly. I am thankful for those who have believed in me and supported me to become who I am now. But, I've been asking myself more and more questions like, "What am I to become? Is this who I am supposed to be? Where will this take me? What am I gaining and losing? Who am I gaining and losing?" The answers to these questions have not been easy to come up with.

For the time being, my life cannot be documented in a method for public consumption. I exist behind the scenes, in the shadows, and in a world you might not be able to grasp. Therefore I cannot guarantee the frequency of new content here. It doesn't hurt to check in every now and then to see though. Have faith in me, continue to believe in me. I am still here for any of you, even if I might not be the man you remember. I have responsbilities to you, my friends, my loved ones, my employer, and my country, and I will continue to be committed to all.

:: Nick 5:43:00 PM [+] ::
...

Yes, I'm bad about posting.

Not a whole lot of exciting stuff going on. I have a flight test project I'm working on, and so far I've been handling most of the logistics. I'm probably going to be driving a pickup truck to Winnetka in a few days. That should be amusing. I'm sure the police department will send their Abrams tank after me once I cross into town. There were a few high school student camps that the KU school of engineering hosted. Two of them were Project Discovery, a SWE thing to get girls involved in engineering. I gave a couple talks, one on robotics and drove the TALON robot around, and another on airplane design and analysis. Kyle, you can place a FWA! on me for that, but according to Shah I did just fine. At the first one, there were a couple girls really interested in robotics and asked some great questions and enjoyed driving the robot around. At the airplane design presentation one girl asked, "Is there a certain method for designing airplanes or do you just kind of go with it?" Commence preaching from the Book of Roskam. The other two camps were guys, and the first one involved driving the TALON around. One of the kids actually asked me for my card because he wanted to get a student license of AAA. More power to him. The second one we cooked smores at the airport on Dr. Ron Barrett's jet engine. Nothing like 3600 degree cooked marshmallows.

I saw "Talladega Nights" last night. Living in Kansas and having actually been to four NASCAR races at the Kansas Speedway, I think the movie was hilarious. I really liked the sponsorship "Me" with big cougar painted on the hood. Awesome. Alright, I'm going to watch "The Pink Panther" with Steve Martin. Should be funny. I promise it won't be another month before I post again.

:: Nick 9:37:00 PM [+] ::
...

I haven't posted in forever.

A couple weeks was out to dinner with some folks from work and a friend, and we were discussing coffee. Somehow we ended up talking about Greek coffee.
"Turkish coffee, you mean."
"No, GREEK coffee."
"Well it sounds a lot like Turkish coffee."
"Where do you think the Turks got it from?" *Angry glare*
"I'm sorry, Nick, please don't ruin my life."

That just made my day.

I spent the 4th of July in Wamego with my buddy Kyle. They have the largest hand-fired fireworks show in the midwest. In addition, we blew up about $120 in fireworks at Kyle's family's house, and burned a whole bunch of jet fuel that I brought with me. Fantastic time.

Have you ever had a friend that you would totally be all up ons if you had the opportunity? Better yet, have you ever had a friend that would be all up on you if she had the opportunity? Its a little strange when a friend acknowledges that in the course of regular conversation.

Thanks to my influence, Efthimios has a rockstar new car: a 2003 Volvo S80-T6. Pearl white with a tan leather interior. Its a sweet ride.

Allwyn and I fixed the screen on the Talon robot's operator control unit. Someone smashed the old one. We were told it would cost $5000 to replace, but Allwyn managed to find the exact part for $230 and we installed it ourselves. We then proceeded to have a victory drive all over the Lawrence Airport, during which we blew a tread off about a half mile away from where we were controlling it. Oh well. Allwyn put it back on and I drove it back.

So an old friend that [I suppose] decided I was too much temptation to continue talking to moved away without ever saying goodbye. Good riddance to bad rubbish I guess.

Alright, thats enough for this post. Until next time...

:: Nick 3:55:00 PM [+] ::
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My phone beat up your Crackberry.

Yes, you heard me right. Unfortunately, over the past week, my PPC6600 cell phone/pda thing developed a crack in its digitizer (touch screen) that rendered it mostly useless. Thankfully I carry an equipment repair and replacement plan. I took it in to Sprint, and have been equipped with the new and improved UTStarcom PPC6700. The big upgrades on the 6700 include Windows Mobile 5, 1.3MP camera, EVDO (high-speed data), and WiFi. I know its hard understand, but yes, my phone has an 802.11b WiFi card.

So Crackberry users, bow to my alpha geek status and know that my gadgetry is better than yours.

:: Nick 6:38:00 AM [+] ::
...

I think that calling my dad today to wish him a happy father's day was a mistake. There was actual adult conversation for about 2 minutes before he simply degenerated into "when are you graduating, what are you going to be, answer my questions" and so on and so forth. Same thing, all the time. Doesn't matter what I say. I try to converse but conversation always becomes interrogation. I've never been treated like an adult by him. In fact, usually I'm told *to my face* that I don't know what I'm talking about. Today it was when I tried to explain battery chemistry while figuring out why my family has destroyed yet another cordless phone. Nope, according to him, I know nothing of the subject. And that's just how it goes. I'm always the ignorant child, berated and belittled at every opportunity, while the hypocrite goes and tells all his friends how smart I am. Yeah, that's nice.

So to all you fathers out there that are decent and good family men, I commend you. And to those who are not, karma sucks.

"WHEN ARE YOU GRADUATING?...WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO BE?...ANSWER MY QUESTIONS!...DO WHAT I TELL YOU!...YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!...NO, YOU'RE WRONG!"

"Happy father's day."

*click*

No, I was right.

:: Nick 5:22:00 PM [+] ::
...

Dear person clicking on the link to my blog from facebook,

WTF are you?

Sincerely,
Nick

Seriously, I've just had an enormous upsurge in visitors from facebook.

:: Nick 8:33:00 PM [+] ::
...

The past few days have been well, slightly more strange than usual. Thursday night at Henry T's we had a special guest appearance by Dr. Colgren. That was fun. Friday, I drove the TALON robot around outside Learned and Eaton trying to figure out a problem with the drive system. I thought a gearbox had been chewed up or a motor wasn't working, but the bug seemed to work itself out. Sunday, we went back to drive it, and to our surprise it seemed as if someone had screwed around with the operator controller, because the screen had been smashed. We were VERY upset. Driving it around to make sure it was still driving right was harder without the cameras...just like playing with an $80,000 remote control car. Today I found out that UGS charges $500 to get a different OS version of their NX software, even if you've already paid umpteen thousands for the license. Boo. I also talked with someone else at UGS about Teamcenter, and after noticing I was in Lawrence, Kansas remarked that she went to Mizzou. I responded with, "I'm sorry." She said, "I said I went to Miz...OH!!!" That made my day. I downloaded the Windows Vista Beta 2 today, and I'm going to install it on either the Sun Ultra 20 or Ultra 40 that are coming my way to evaluate.

And it seems I have allowed Kyle's hatred of people to flow into me. Yup, you guessed it: I hate people.

:: Nick 7:36:00 PM [+] ::
...

/me bangs head on wall

what did I just do?

:: Nick 12:12:00 AM [+] ::
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Kevin is buying a house here in Lawrence. Nice place, there will be plenty good times there I'm sure.

Geez, first Kyle goes house shopping, now Kevin. We're getting old.

:: Nick 9:01:00 PM [+] ::
...

(23:45:37) Nathan: was *** the person she was cheatin on?
(23:45:41) Nathan: HOLY SH*T!
(23:45:41) Me: yeah
(23:45:54) Nathan: dude, that's like playing w/ matches
(23:46:01) Me: I didn't know!
(23:46:01) Nathan: around a f*cking tank
(23:46:03) Nathan: that hates you

Edited for the innocents...and to possibly spare my life.

:: Nick 11:59:00 PM [+] ::
...

Tonight we celebrated Allwyn's 27th birthday. Kevin, Nelson, Efthimios and I met up at Henry T's and had some food expecting Allwyn to come, but it was getting late, and it was approaching time for our little surprise for him. At 12:30 we went to Henry's where we met with a couple other people and surprised Allwyn with a cake. The cake had some Kip Dynamite pictures on it and a reference to R2D2. Everyone in the bar joined in singing happy birthday to Allwyn, and we had an all around good time.

Today we got two interns at work, and as we were deciding what computer equipment to give them, I got to ask Juby, "do the interns get glocks?"

Jessica will be in Kansas City this weekend. We'll see if she actually tries to take the time to come to Lawrence or have me come see her. Honestly, I doubt it; this has turned into a really ugly mess that has proven extremely difficult to deal with.

In reference to one of my new friends whom I find quite intriguing, I read something today which really rained on my parade. Bah. Whatever.

Its way past my bedtime. Good night.

:: Nick 2:53:00 AM [+] ::
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Its time for a poll.

Do you tip at a chinese buffet? Should you tip at a chinese buffet? Leave your responses in the comments section.

:: Nick 2:05:00 PM [+] ::
...

This month has brought a couple interesting visitors here.

1) Garmin. Hi Kurt!
2) DARcorporation. What? I run the network, why are people looking for my personal website from work? In the name of productivity, its time to add "mucci.blogspot.com" to the router's blacklist.
3) The Ohio State University. Is that you Val?
4) The University of Chicago. Most of the people I knew from there are gone. I wonder who this was.
5) The United States Air Force. I've now had the Army, Navy, and Air Force, and various defense contractors come to my site. Why? Beats me.

A few referrals from this month have been good too.
1) ku.facebook.com. Someone (or several people) are actually coming here from my facebook page. Neat.
2) Google.
2a) "UPTMMLS" That totally made my day.
2b) "Country Hill Motors Merriam" Hah! Someone else got to read about how they tried to rip us off.

I'm not including the "nick mucci" and "nothing in particular" queries that I get all the time.

3) Yahoo: "kansas university cresis uav." Whoa. Yeah, I've helped, but I'm not a definitive source of information on the topic. Go bug Nelson Brown. He's the man to talk to.

Hope you enjoyed this traffic analysis.

I'm going to head to the Cubs/Sox game on May 19. That should be great. I'm going to go with Brian Ginsberg, and a couple other people who have yet to be determined.

Shifting gears again, I got a phone call from my brother at about 1am this morning. He was demanding to know the master password to the family computer. The family computer is a Mac Mini that I had the folks get because I could set it up in such a way that they could do everything they needed but not have the power to break it. So, I created a password that would be required whenever someone tried to make changes to the system to prevent them from doing so. Simple. And, the password only exists inside my head, it has never been written down or recorded in plaintext anywhere else. Well, this didn't sit so well with my brother. He spent 27 minutes (yes, I counted) on the phone with me yelling, swearing, and threatening me because he wanted the password so he could install a newer version of iTunes. Let's recap some of the good lines, and some select responses:

"I hope you get hit by a car when you drive up here."
"I hope you die and rot in hell."
"That's awfully nice of you to say, Peter."
"You'd better hope you don't need anything from me because I won't help you."
"Oh, ok. No problem."
"Mom said you have to give me the password."
"Nice try, but they know about the password and agree that its best to keep the machine safe from accidental problems."
"I'm gonna start deleting things unless you tell me the password."
"Have at it, I don't have anything on there. Its all your stuff and our parents'."
"I'm gonna have Bob reformat it with some cds he got at the rummage sale."
"Have fun explaining to Dad what you did with all his stuff."

As many know, the name Peter is derived from the greek word "petros," which means "rock." So, you could accurately call someone "dumb as a box of Peters."

In the end I think he gave up. If he had Bob reformat it, both of them are in for a world of hurt when I get back.

Speaking of Bob, I've been worried about him lately. Specifically, worried about when the hell he's going to grow up. I don't like seeing my best friend wallowing in the complacency of never going anywhere in life. Its like he sees nothing wrong with stagnation; he and his new group of friends (including my brother) don't have any desire to DO ANYTHING, and it scares the crap out of me.

On a more downtrodden noted, Jessica and I are trying to pick up the pieces and figure out where to go from here. I don't know if that is going to happen. Even if it does, I don't know what the two of us will be.

In conclusion, screw hippies.

:: Nick 5:42:00 PM [+] ::
...

"There's a fine, fine line between a lover and a friend;
There's a fine, fine line between reality and pretend;
And you never know 'til you reach the top if it was worth the uphill climb.

There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time.

There's a fine, fine line between a fairy tale and a lie;
And there's a fine, fine line between "You're wonderful" and "Goodbye."
I guess if someone doesn't love you back it isn't such a crime,
But there's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of your time.

And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore.
I don't think that you even know what you're looking for.
For my own sanity, I've got to close the door
And walk away...
Oh...

There's a fine, fine line between together and not
And there's a fine, fine line between what you wanted and what you got.
You gotta go after the things you want while you're still in your prime...

There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time."

- Avenue Q, "There's a fine, fine line"

363 days ago I couldn't have imagined this. It's over, and there's nothing I can do.

On a lighter note, I have amassed a nationwide following of agricultural pilots to support an investigation I'm on with the FAA.

But I'm alone.

:: Nick 1:13:00 AM [+] ::
...

I remembered today why I hate windows so much. I have a Motorola HS850 bluetooth headset for my phone that I configured today. Only problem was that my phone crashed and took with it a whole bunch of programs, documents, and pictures. It claimed they had been backed up into "permanent" memory, but that clearly was not the case. But I have a bluetooth headset now. Bah.

Yesterday I went flying with Brian and Allwyn. We took Brian's Piper Saratoga from Lawrence to Salina for K-State's fly-in and open house. Flying in an advanced small plane was really neat. I passed out some Kansas UAV Consortium flyers and put up a poster. You know what happened? People were getting all up in my grill because the aircraft on the flyer were from KU. Well, there was a big ol' powercat on the poster too, but I guess that just wasn't enough. We climbed aboard a KC-135 from the 190th Air Refueling Wing. That sucker is big. Gotta love those long JT8 engines and their nonexistent bypass ratio. We also saw a couple of C-5s and saw one take off. My brain had great difficulty processing the imagery of such a massive aircraft flying. It was most impressive.

I've been feeling a little confused lately and I am questioning my actions and direction, or as some argue, my lack thereof. I know what I need, but the factors that motivated me most have been waning.

The UPTMMLS is still here.

:: Nick 8:34:00 PM [+] ::
...

...and your prize is...a new car!

I'll be rolling down the street in style again. I just got a 1988 Volvo 740GLE sedan. B230F 2.3L inline-4 engine, M47 5-speed manual transmission. She's a nice dark metallic blue-green color, but the paint is kinda sunbaked. Drives great. I need to think up a name though, any suggestions?

A pallet from DHL arrived for me at work yesterday. It was a dream come true. For evaluation, I got a brand spanking new Sun Fire T2000 server. 4-core 1.0GHz UltraSPARC T1 processor (16 virtual CPUs), 8GB RAM, 2x 73 GB 2.5" 10k RPM SAS drives, Quad-gigabit ethernet, running Solaris 10. I just wish I could fix Xnest and xdm so the stupid X sessions won't reset all the time. Too bad I have to give the machine back in May.

Today was William's birthday and I got to hang out with Drs. Roskam, Barrett, Hale, and Wetzel. Good times.

:: Nick 10:36:00 PM [+] ::
...

There is debate as to whether or not the 76mph winds this morning that ripped Lawrence apart were from a tornado. Its bad enough that uprooted trees blocked streets and millions in damage was done to KU shutting it down tomorrow. I was without power for a while and took a shower in the dark, but thankfully electricity came back so I could listen to the KU vs. Texas game. Yeah, that was great.

It turns out that KU's Computer Center went down hard today in the storms. Network resources are coming back up now though. In contrast, at 12:04pm, all services at DAR were 100% functional. Victory is mine.

(18:21:11) Nelson: I'm glad my weather generator is working
(18:21:17) Me: hahaha
(18:21:40) Nelson: I was thinking of drawing a radar map that in red/green says "pwned"
(18:22:01) Me: lawrence got 0wnz0r3d by m07h3r n4tur3
(18:23:05) Nelson: heh
(18:23:18) Nelson: I think we should blame it on the CReSIS people
(18:26:56) Me: nah then it can come back to you
(18:27:12) Me: make all the tinfoil hat people happy and blame it on HAARP
(18:27:33) Me: or if you want to be truthful
(18:27:37) Me: blame it on Chuck Norris
(18:27:42) Nelson: heh
(18:28:03) Nelson: he should not have seduced mother nature, that motherf*cker
(18:28:38) Nelson: oh well, not that he could help it

:: Nick 6:31:00 PM [+] ::
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"This town is full of babes!" -Allwyn

This came after seeing some jocohos in the cars next to us in Lawrence, and a few hours after ogling the supreme hottness of the girl at the car rental place. Let me put it this way: light colored suit, black thong. Therefore, God exists.

:: Nick 8:33:00 PM [+] ::
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What the fsck is this? That isn't a Greek flag. Someone needs to be beaten. This was part of an advertisement on facebook. I'm debating whether or not to find out who runs the ad, and then tell them they are stupid.

:: Nick 5:33:00 PM [+] ::
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Why I Would Never Buy A Car From Country Hill Motors

I went car shopping with my friend Allwyn this weekend. At the dealer in Merriam, KS, we drove several cars. I was not impressed with the quality of the dealer's stock. We drove a Pontiac Grand Am that started up with the "Coolant Low" and "Service Engine Soon" lights on. Later we drove an Oldsmobile Alero with a faulty coolant temperature sensor or gauge. Last, but certainly not least, came my experience with a certain 1986 BMW 325e that they are selling.

The exterior of the car isn't that great. There is a dent in the right side front fender, and the inappropriate "M" badge on the trunk lid is faded. The weatherstripping was not correctly installed. The interior is a disaster: the center console is falling out of the dashboard, and part of the front passenger seat fell off during the test drive. The power steering is either damaged, failing, or very low on fluid. To top it off the car has 217,000 miles on it. Guess how much these people want for the car? $4,000! Why? I was told that it was a very rare version of the 3-series, and that it was a BMW "M" through and through. I told the dealer that I didn't believe that, since the manufacturer's badging on the door pillar indicated that it was a 325e and manufactured in a year before the M3. He shrugged off my observations and told me I was wrong. When I requested a Carfax report on the car for verification, the dealer refused my request. I got the VIN for the car and proceeded to run my own Carfax, which corroborated my observation that the car is not, in fact, an M, as they claim. First, it has an M20 engine. Second, the instrument cluster is missing the M logo. Third, the shifter is missing the M logo. Fourth, the M wasn't made until model year 1987, and this car is a model year 1986. I then contacted BMW to verify my findings. I spoke with Baron BMW, the major dealer in Kansas City. They confirmed everything I found out about the car, that it was not an M. Interestingly, the car was a trade-in to Baron which was then sold to Country Hill. In conclusion, Country Hill Motors refused to discount their price for the car below $3,000. Trust me, the car is maybe worth $1,000 in its condition. Given the concerted effort to deceive me, I will never trust that dealer, and I will tell everyone I know to avoid them.

:: Nick 4:50:00 PM [+] ::
...

No Sugar Coated Crap Today.

I know a whole bunch of people came here today expecting some sort of vicious and scathing valentine's day post. Sorry. As some of you know, I've been dating someone for the past nine months. Unfortunately, theres a few hundred miles between us, and its been a while since I've seen her. We care about each other a lot, and it will be tough not seeing her today.

Yesterday I was convinced that Der Panzerwagen has again saved my life. I was in a four-car accident at rush hour on Bob Billings. The SL looks ugly as sin now, but it was well enough to drive away and park somewhere safe. I ended up having it towed back to my apartment since the radiator was leaking. I didn't have a scratch on me; I didn't feel a thing. Nobody else was hurt either. I'm lucky, I guess.

Looks like its time to bite the bullet and do the valve adjustment on the SD. I think that I am at a point in my life where I shouldn't own any more SLs for a while.

So, on valentine's day, I know there's a girl out there who thinks of me, misses having me around, and I'm ok. There isn't much more I can ask for.

:: Nick 1:35:00 PM [+] ::
...

(16:35:53) Jason Weinberg: my tongue is the ugliest thing ever
(16:36:09) Jason Weinberg: it looks like it's covered in raw sulfer and feta cheese

I agree. Ugliest thing ever.

:: Nick 4:38:00 PM [+] ::
...

(19:56:10) Me: you know, ford's kuhneutson valves are only good for 25k miles, you might need yours replaced soon
(19:56:38) Efthimios: kuhneutson?
(19:56:56) Me: they are very important
(19:57:17) Me: it is part of the engine block oil bypass system
(19:59:10) Efthimios: how do you know about ford's?
(19:59:24) Me: dude, I know damn near everything
(19:59:38) Me: or at least a lot closer to everything than most people

:: Nick 9:02:00 PM [+] ::
...

(21:06:23) Maria: So Nick
(21:06:30) Maria: How much ditigal electronics do you remember?
(21:06:40) Me: a bunch
(21:06:41) Maria: Want to help me design 3 circuits?
...
(21:07:43) Maria: First I need to make an arbiter circuit
(21:08:00) Maria: That takes in n bits
(21:08:23) Maria: and also a one hot input that tells you which bit is to be considered the most important
(21:08:33) Maria: So it is a variation off of a normal arbiter
(21:08:52) Maria: Then the priority circles around
(21:09:53) Maria: (ie if the input is 7 bits, the 5th is the most important, then the 4th would be the next most important, 3rd second most important, and the 6th would be the least important

Someday she is going to make some geek very, very happy.

:: Nick 11:21:00 PM [+] ::
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(01:10:06) Me: http://www2.ljworld.com/news/2006/jan/28/protest_aims_save_wave/?city_local
(01:10:48) Nick Poulos: haha, nice
(01:11:27) Me: so now lawrence is the 2nd meanest city to homeless people and crossing guards
(01:11:57) Nick Poulos: well, y'know, with their ties to Al Qaeda, makes sense

:: Nick 1:14:00 AM [+] ::
...

Recently I found my brother's myspace profile. It was typical of an uneducated wahoo who thinks he is cool. The best part though was in the personal description area. Under "Body Type," my brother listed "5'11" and "Body Builder." I laughed so hard. I emailed him to tell him that he had made my day. Today he replied.

(21:54:59) Peter: i hate ur email
(21:55:00) Peter: i hate ur email
(21:55:06) Peter: *kicks u in the nuts
(21:55:15) Me: punch
(21:58:32) Me: "body builder" ...hehehe that was great
(21:58:41) Peter: i can bench 345
(21:58:51) Peter: that constitutes me as a body builder
(21:58:55) Me: says who?
(21:59:04) Peter: and who else do you know that can leg press 1500 lbs?
(21:59:25) Me: a few
(21:59:34) Peter: i doubt that
(21:59:50) Me: you forget I work with members of the military
(22:01:18) Me: *awkward pause*
(22:02:09) Me: hehehe
(22:02:10) Peter logged out.

"Body Builder, eh? Yeah, if the body he is trying to build is potato shaped." - Kyle

Go Team Peter.

:: Nick 10:01:00 PM [+] ::
...

(21:41:56) Cliff: What my Vitamin Water reads:

50 cent's new album is bound to go platinum. So Formula 50 decided to go platinum too. Not to be outdone, we are happy to announce our own album, "hydrate or die tryin'." All we need is one little shout out at the MTV video music awards. Suckaz be movin' out the way at them beverage conferences. Plus, our drink has the nutrients you need to fuel you through your day. That's how we roll here in Queens.
(21:42:08) Cliff: thought you might like that
(21:42:32) Me: that might be the greatest thing I have ever seen

:: Nick 5:06:00 PM [+] ::
...

(18:13:38) Me: urgent 1989 rap music update
(18:15:30) Brian Ginsberg: oooh
(18:15:33) Brian Ginsberg: yes?
(18:15:55) Me: you won't believe what I heard on 95.7 FM, Ottawa, KS
(18:16:11) Me: None other than "The Humpty Dance"
(18:16:15) Brian Ginsberg: nice!
(18:16:23) Me: like all six minutes of its majesty
(18:16:28) Me: and samoans
(18:16:28) Brian Ginsberg: oh excellent
(18:16:32) Brian Ginsberg: you got the full-play version
(18:16:35) Brian Ginsberg: that's crucial
(18:16:50) Me: KC radio stations are the best in midwest
(18:18:11) Brian Ginsberg: based on what you just told me, i have a hard time disagreeing w/that statement

:: Nick 6:17:00 PM [+] ::
...

"I may not always love you
But as long as there are stars above you
You'll never need to doubt it
I'll make you so sure about it

'Cause god only knows what I'd be without you

And if you should ever leave me
The world would still go on, believe me
And the world could show nothing to me
So what good will living do me

God only knows what I'd be without you
God only knows what I'd be without you"

- The Beach Boys, "God Only Knows"

:: Nick 11:47:00 PM [+] ::
...

(20:52:12) Me: I so have upgraded my ticket on the Red Eye Flight to Hell.
(20:52:28) Nick Poulos: when/where's that?
(20:52:50) Me: kinda whenever, but it is going to be at an inopportune time, yet nonstop
(20:52:57) Me: just straight to hell
(20:53:23) Nick Poulos: I didn't think anyone flew to Manhattan, KS
(20:54:08) Me: apparently george bush does
(20:54:58) Me: he's giving a lecture at k-state

:: Nick 8:56:00 PM [+] ::
...

I had a bunch of stuff I had to do at work today, but it was dependent on people outside the company who blew me off, so I really didn't get much accomplished. We got that Cryohawk engine running today for about 25 minutes. I ended up with a nontrivial amount of 100LL aviation gas on myself. Fuel lines leaked, and we had an awful time bleeding them. On our second start attempt, the engine refused to start. It turns out that we probably flooded it. It started and ran fine later. I have a bit of a headache. The lead in the exhaust fumes probably caused it. Dr. Colgren offered me a funded project, this time from Sandia National Labs. I am going to give him a call tomorrow and ask what it is, but I am most likely going to stay put. I can't overextend myself. At least there is Henry T's tonight, that will make me feel better.

:: Nick 8:02:00 PM [+] ::
...

today was a long, long day. I spent some time at the airport working on the Cryohawk UAV. It turns out that the $2,000 custom landing gear wasn't built right and is not fitting properly. I helped make a jig to align the outer wing spars and line up the wing ribs. Last, I went and bought some 100LL and started setting up one of the engines on a test stand for its first start and break-in period. This morning I coded, fixed stuff, started messing around with NEi Nastran, and tried convincing Sun Microsystems that I am in dire need of a Sun Fire T2000 server to test for 60 days. I'm tired.

:: Nick 10:19:00 PM [+] ::
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"My favorite things in life are these: true love, the love of Jesus Christ, spontaneous hugs, obnoxious laughter, sharp minds, great friends, my family, all things Jayhawk, the feeling that I'm part of something bigger than myself, 'small world' connections, cuddling, and Mountain Dew."

- Seen on a profile on the KU Facebook.

You know what I love? The fact that "the love of Jesus Christ" is equated with Mountain Dew. YES.

:: Nick 11:06:00 PM [+] ::
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Carl Junction, Missouri: Where a Carl meet a Carl comin' thro' the rye.

:: Nick 12:04:00 AM [+] ::
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While I was home for the holidays, I got a chance to escape for a little bit. I spent some great time with my friends, but also had time to spend by myself to think and reflect upon life.

Christmas Eve: Arrived in Chicago as the sun rose. Took a cab from Midway to the Conrad Hilton. Cabbie was an inorganic chemist. We had great conversation. I tipped him well. Met with my family in an executive suite on the 21st floor. Ate breakfast of fresh fruit, Carr's crackers, cheese, and champagne. Indulged in a 30 minute shower. Left the hotel, ate lunch at Lou Mitchell's. Went home, rested. Met with family at Aunt Mary's house for dinner and presents.

Christmas: Breakfast with Uncle Ted and his family. Santa was very good to me. Dinner at my brother's godparents' house in St. Charles.

Time between Christmas and New Years: Saw Poulosi, Ruth, Kevin & Karen, Brian & Sarah (she is highly approved of), ate good food, had fun times, fixed a bunch of stuff. I received a phone call from my good friend Ted in Lawrence wishing me a happy new year. That phone call really made my night.

Between New Years and now: Fixed more stuff, played some games, hung out with friends and family, and caught a flight back to Lawrence. I did some database programming, fixed some more stuff, and hung out at the airport talking with Andy, the KU airport director, while he was working on the 172. I went shopping for an HDTV with Kevin; nothing was purchased but that may change for him by tomorrow. Finally I watched the KU vs. Yale basketball game and watched the Bulldogs get blown out of the water. Then I came here.

I'm starting to get some more direction in life. I know there are some of you out there who don't believe it, and I don't know what I can do right now to change that. Actually, I don't think the people this pertains to even read this, so I don't know why I even bother.

I have been listening to one song in particular lately a lot. It really makes me think about what I'm doing with myself. Maybe you'll get it, maybe you won't. I just know that I am running out of time to make the most important decisions of my life.

"There's a fine, fine line between a lover and a friend;
There's a fine, fine line between reality and pretend;
And you never know 'til you reach the top if it was worth the uphill climb.

There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time.

There's a fine, fine line between a fairy tale and a lie;
And there's a fine, fine line between "You're wonderful" and "Goodbye."
I guess if someone doesn't love you back it isn't such a crime,
But there's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of your time.

And I don't have the time to waste on you anymore.
I don't think that you even know what you're looking for.
For my own sanity, I've got to close the door
And walk away...
Oh...

There's a fine, fine line between together and not
And there's a fine, fine line between what you wanted and what you got.
You gotta go after the things you want while you're still in your prime...

There's a fine, fine line between love
And a waste of time."

- Avenue Q - There's a Fine, Fine Line

Oh, and happy new year. 2005 was completely crazy. Lots of incredible things happened to me, both good and not-so-good. Let's see what 2006 brings.

Happy Birthday, Jessica.

:: Nick 10:01:00 PM [+] ::
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